These are some really difficult times we are all going through. The past couple of weeks, as I’ve been “forced” to stay home with little more to do than think, read, binge documentaries and other mindless shows, I’ve had plenty of time to come to terms with the fact that some books just aren’t meant for me. It’s not necessarily the book that’s bad or the story is bad. It’s just that the book does not resonate with me.
For the past four years I’ve made it a mission to read Anna Kerinina. I’ve even downloaded the movie thinking that if I watched the movie I would feel inspired to read the book. For four years I’ve beaten myself up because I still haven’t been able to accomplish that goal. There is always another book, another something to do. I can’t focus, I need water. There is a blockage, I thought. Why can’t I read this “stupid” book?
This week I came to terms with it. It’s not the book and it’s not me. We just aren’t meant to cross paths at this time. I’m not going to force myself to read something that I’m not interested in reading. Reading should not be painful and I always felt stressed when I sat down to read that book. I don’t know why and perhaps I will never know why but does it matter? Perhaps one day, without forcing it, I will pick it up again and read it and love it. Right now I’m pretty certain that if I sit down and force myself to read it or listen to it, I’m going to resent it. That will not be fair to the author or the book or the words written on the page. A book should bring you pleasure and allow you to dream and envision yourself in the story. Right now I would be reading it just to say I’ve read it and that’s no reason to read a book.
Anyway, I hope every one is doing well and staying healthy and enjoying time with a special book. What is your special book?
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